Years ago I had a student who told me he was half Jewish and half Christian. He explained that he received 8 Hanukkah gifts from one set of grandparents and a Christmas present from the other grandparents. He thought that was great. However, after preparing the mailing labels and paying the postage on-line for family Christmas gifts I can only say that I definitely can't afford to be Jewish.
This transaction was fun up to a point and one saves a little on postage. Fortunately I have a very old kitchen scale which is reasonably accurate, and it notes lbs. and oz. And, believe me, there was some serious poundage. The packages to Illinois and our nation's capital were fairly easy. However the package to Canada . . . .Well, here's what happened.
Not only did USPS want to know how much it weighed (17 lbs. 2 oz.) but the dimensions of the box. I put all that in, and then was asked the contents, and I was thrilled that the drop down menu listed "gifts." That was my selection, of course. But just wait. Customs was about to insert itself. Next section down *required* each included item be described along with its value and weight. This was a test to see whether or not I was honest about overall weight and value, I think. Of course, the challenge was to remember what was in the monster box. There were gifts for one daughter, one son-in-law, and three grandchildren, and most of them were getting two surprises. Besides it had already been two days since I wrapped it all up.
My frustration level began to edge upward as I contemplated "one pair purple cotton socks", $3.95,______. How much does one pair of socks weigh? How much does a hair brush & comb set weight? When I completed the list the little computer tally thingy indicated that my items weighed too much. That made me angry, but I also thought it was funny since I was making up all those numbers anyway. At this point the dogs appeared to be somewhat nervous about my mental state and asked to go out though the temperature was still in the 40's.
After editing the weight of a couple of items I satisfied the aforesaid "tally thingy", and I was good to go on to giving the postal service my credit card number. Then came the big moment: printing my label and postage. The program informed me that this would require 5 pages---and it did. One page was filled with directions which included taking it to the post off. Bet you thought that wouldn't be necessary, but those customs lists had to go into a special plastic bag and be taped to the package. I didn't think a Zip-lock would satisfy them. But I had completed all this business, and I was pretty pleased with myself. Just when I gave the computer the go ahead to print out the transaction # and verification the browser shut down. My reaction to that apparently encouraged the cats to exit the house as well.
I am now home from the P.O. (BTW you have to mail on the day you print the postage.) Everything went surprisingly well there, and I didn't even have to wait in line. That was scary.
One request: Relatives in Canada must not remove and read customs list before Christmas Day. Is that clear?
One resolution: Personally selected three dimentional gifts in the future will only be given to persons whom I visit or who visit me. Is that clear?
One question: Could I have survived sending Hanukkah gifts?
